Aaaaaahhhhh monsters

So moving back to my gmas house to help take care of my gpa was one thing but to move into my momma house at 33 is a different story and I’ma tell ya what she has enough stuff to fill 2 homes fully furnished and closets full maybe even 3 homes no joke y’all and I mean I have clothes and some personal shit but no furniture or anything I’m not sure how the fuck I’ma fit to be honest like idk how plan was get a camper I’ll stay in the back yard right right but here’s the thing the camper thing fell threw but I can’t not go with her my step dad is stage 5 kidney failure (not gonna help with my episodes bc ummm stressful) but she needs help with him and she needs someone she can talk to and shit so I’ma fucking be there for her no questions asked just gotta be better about taking my meds and getting my shot done on time. Bc it’s not full effect yet I’m still kinda out there but I did finally get it and take it yesterday. Way way late but still. It’s hitting different this time bc of the gap time and they upped the dose so I’m way off and way weird but it’ll mellow out it’s just usually not this harsh of a hit to my everything. Ummmm anyway yes I’m not sure how the actual fuck I’ma fit me, my dogs, my shit, and my mental health into their home I’m tripping bc I gotta have organization and some structure and routine type life style or I spiral and that’s not at all how they live… Till I can get on disability I’m kinda fucked bc nobody lives like I do in my family and my ass is hard to deal with hard to love and even harder to be around nonstop I know this even if she’s not saying it like i feel like I’m a burden to her… hindering to her ability to live her life like she wants now she has to worry about yet another person she keeps saying it ain’t like that but ummm it’s like that I can not see how I will be any help. Anyway just needed to vent that out real fast. To anyone with imaginary friends or whispers like me I advise this invega shot for real for real. It is weird and kinda woooohoooo at first but when you level and realize how quiet quiet really is it’s kinda crazy and you get a little peace for me it’s not completely stopped my shit but it’s made it so much more barrable I was able to go get groceries and shit when I was doing good on my meds and I mean go get groceries and enjoyed it it was a first in a long time anyway I gotta get back to packing xoxoxo.. catch y’all later