so they upped my shot dose

like i knew they was gonna up it and shit but i didn’t expect it to make my blood pressure drop but didn’t think upping my mgs would make the blood pressure issue worse figured it would just stay the same as much as i like this shot i may have to see if there are other options for a shot a month for my coocoo shit, like my blood pressure gets so low i cant function at times but the voices are less often and way less invasive so its working just not exactly ideal when my blood pressure drops to 83/50 that shit had me feeling all types of fucked off…. i dont know just hate this hop scotch bull shit game we gotta play to find the right meds when it comes to mental health and staying safe its like russion rullet with scripts and suicidal people its stupid so i gotta tell yall, my steop dad had a heart attack right and it was like a full blockage deal and now they say he needs open heart surgery but they wont do the surgery bc hes in such bad shape from drinkin smoken and drugs over the years hes just fucked himself up. his heart is bad and hes on dialysis plus hes got some mental isssues goin on from the dialysis not getting all the toxicons out of his system like we do from peeing sweating and pooing bc he doesn’t do any of that like he should and does not pee at all he gets fucking like dementia symptoms mixed with hallucinations so he gets very agressive and he is so verbily abusive towards my mom its almost impossible to deal with him without losing my shit but so far i have done really good about walkjing away and stating why i am doing so also im finding my self getting lonely and really missing having a person to trust love be loved by and be touched i miss being touchced and held